By the Lake
by page-write
Summary: Ginny in depression...You saved my life and my heart but the pain and thirst in my body can only be soothed and quenched by the lake.


**_Summary: _Ginny is suicidal and Harry is left to save her from herself.**

**_Rating: _PG-13 for suicidal themes and romantic themes**

**_Pairing:_ Harry/Ginny**

**

* * *

**

**By The Lake**

* * *

_**Every time I try to fly  
I fall without my wings  
I feel so small  
I guess I need you baby  
and every time I see you in my dreams**_

_**I see your face, you're haunting me  
I guess I need you baby**_

_**I may have made it rain  
Please forgive me  
my weakness caused you pain  
and this song is my sorry**_

_Harry,_

_I'm sorry. I'm sorry but my life cannot be lived anymore. You saved my life and my heart but the pain and thirst in my body can only be soothed and quenched by the lake. It's all been so hard but I never let on. No one knows. Don't worry, none of this is your fault...in fact you almost stopped it. But when I stop living in the routine I get washed out by the past and the present. Dumbledore said that the worries and pains were just all in my head and I'm sure he's right but let that be as it may...the problem is still there. It all just means I'm mental. And well...if it's in my head...then it won't hurt so badly if my head doesn't exist anymore. Don't forget that this couldn't be helped. You've saved me before but you cannot save me from myself. So know that my love for you is eternal even when I am not._

_Across whatever distance there is, I send my love,_

_Ginny Weasley_

Tears slid down her cheeks as she signed her letter. Stuffing it into an envelope, she checked the common room for anyone who might have slipped in without her noticing. No one. Quietly she approached the 7th year boy's dormitories. Pushing open the door she slipped in.

She quickly found Harry's bed and dropped the letter on the pillow where her head had once laid with his. A sob escaped her lips as she turned and fled the room.

Ginny found her cloak and flung it on as she made her way out of the castle. The fall breeze bit at her unprotected cheeks as she made her way across the grounds.

She knew the spot by the lake well for she often sat there with Harry or by herself when she needed to be alone. This place would be her last memory to take with her to the grave. Her watery grave. She looked out across the clear waters of the lake. She looked at her surroundings trying to absorb the colors and details.

With a tentative hand she touched the willow bark and reached for her wand. Slowly Ginny slid down into the hollow created by the tree roots. She wiped her tears drew her knees close. She let the memories flow. The good and beautiful things first followed by the bad. The bad seemed to far out weigh the good and she reminded herself that's why she was doing this. To stop the tears that she was crying. She knew why it hurt. All piled together the memories hurt...everything had become so much more confusing when she found the diary of Tom Riddle. But Harry had saved her. Harry. He mind fluttered on him for a moment. Almost everything was better when she was with him. After her third year he didn't look at her like she was just Ron's little sister. He looked at her like she meant something, was someone. He became that glow in her life. The beacon of the lighthouse that brought her back from the dark place in her mind. _Harry_

She didn't want to hurt him but she didn't want the rest of it all to go on forever.

She brooded on everything like this for some time but her thoughts always drifted back to Harry. She loved him. That she knew for sure. But that was all she knew for sure.

Finally she stood up and turned her wand on herself. "Ad...ad...Avada..." she started. The tears welled up in her eyes. She couldn't do it. "Coward that I am", she whispered. Slowly she climbed up onto a massive tree root that arched up and out into the lake. "I have to do this", she said aloud to the lake as if it was alive. Alive in a way that she could comprehend.

She stood there for a moment before turning her wand on herself again. "Pertifcus Totalus", she said in a commanding voice. Her body stiffened and her limbs jumped together under the full body bind. Her wand clattered down into the water as gravity took effect and Ginny Weasley fell down into the dark waters of the lake. Behind her she heard a shout just before she broke the surface and sank to the bottom.

Harry, Ron and Hermione climbed into the Gryffindor common room each carrying a large stack of books. "And the muggle said I'm sorry I just can't help but think...my friends out there picking watermelons!" said Ron at the punch line of his joke. The all roared with laughter. Tears leaked out of Harry's eyes as he tipped his books onto a chair. Wiping his face he turned and asked, "Has anyone seen Ginny?"

Colin Creevy sat in a squashy armchair by the fireplace reading with a particularly somber look on his face. Harry noticed and walked over to him "Colin?" The boy looked at him and smiled weakly. "I saw her come out of the boys dormitories and leave the common room in a rush...she didn't seem very happy", he said before turning back to his book. "The dormitories?" he cast a worried look over his shoulder at Ron and Hermione, "Why would she be in there without me...I mean, us?" Hermione frowned with concern and Ron just shrugged. "She was probably just looking for us".

"She's out on the grounds you say?" Colin nodded.

"Well maybe she left a note or something..."

He turned on his heels and climbed up the stairs to the dormitories. Once inside he looked around. Everything seemed okay...just as it was before. Except for an envelope that lay on his pillow. Slowly he picked it up and examined it. There was no address or indication of who it was too. "Well are you just going to stare at the damn thing or are you going to open it?" said Ron who had come in behind him. Harry had a bad feeling about the letter. Something just wasn't right. He slid his finger under the flap and tore the envelope open. He pulled out a letter and as he read it his face dropped and his hands shook.

"What? What does it say?" Harry's face was white as he dropped the letter in Ron's hands. He made to get his cloak as the letter dropped from Ron's hands. Ron grabbed his cloak and ran after Harry who had already disappeared through the portrait hole. Harry prayed to whatever was out there listening that they would make it to Ginny in time. He knew that she was sometimes suicidal but nothing had ever happened before. Dumbledore said it was just depression and that it would pass. Harry never doubted him until now.

The fall wind burst into the entry hall as he threw open the door. The November wind bit at his hands and face as he rushed down to the lake, to the willow tree that he and Ginny had often sat together. A red haired figure stood on the long tree that branched out into the lake. "Ginny!" he cried out. If she heard she made no sign to show it. She pulled out her wand and pointed it at herself. Her limbs sprang together with the full body bind and she fell into the dark waters.

It seemed like time slowed down. Ginny disappeared beneath the water. Behind Harry, Ron choked out a sob. Harry's legs wouldn't move fast enough. His feet pounded on the grass as he pushed himself to go faster. He reached the edge of the lake two seconds later and dove in.

He couldn't see very well in the murky water. Just out of his reach he saw her pale face and vibrant red hair fanning out around her. Giving one last kick he felt her shoulders under his fingers. He grabbed a hold of her and pulled her towards the surface.

His lungs were burning and he wished he had had a gillyweed with him before he dove in but it was a little late for that. He broke the surface and gasped in air. Ginny weighed heavy in his arms as he pulled her to the edge. "Oh god no!" he heard Ron cry. "Help me!" said Harry as he desperately tried to revive her. But Ron was useless as he sat rocking back and forth, moaning and staring at Ginny's motionless body.

_**Every time I try to fly  
I fall without my wings  
I feel so small  
I guess I need you baby  
Every time I see you in my dreams  
I see your face, you're haunting me  
I guess I need you baby**_

Harry had very limited knowledge in CPR but he did the best he could through his tears. Just like magic she came to life. Coughing and sputtering, she gasped for air. She looked at Harry and whispered, "No..." as he wrapped her in tight hug. Ron wiped his face and gave a shout when he saw her awake. His feet thudded as he ran to their side. Close to sobbing, he too hugged Ginny. Her face was shining with silent tears. "I'm so sorry Harry...you weren't suppose to...I didn't mean...I'm sorry!" With that she collapsed in their arms with racking sobs.

Harry held her as close as he could with Ron hanging onto them. He stroked her hair softly and whispered, "It's okay Ginny...It's okay..." She struggled to compose herself while still crying. She looked over at Ron, "Ron please don't tell mum...if she found out...I don't know what she'd do..." He nodded as more tears leaked out of her eyes.

Slowly Harry helped her up and the three of them headed back to the castle. In the entry hall Ron left them to find Hermione to tell her what had happened and Harry and Ginny continued on to the hospital wing.

Outside the doors of the infirmary Harry stopped and pulled her close and looked into her eyes. "Ginny promise me something?"

"Anything"

"Next time you feel like going for another swim in the lake wait for me...because no matter what I will always be there to save you".

"I promise Harry"

"Good", he said as he leaned in to claim her lips with his.

* * *

**Author's Note/ Disclaimer: Hey I hope you like this one...please review for me...recent studies show that reviewing is very beneficial to your health...LOL**

**Okay from the top...the characters in this fanfic are not mine...the words from the Brittany Spears song 'Every time'...also not mine...characters and setting are JK Rowling's and lyrics are Brittany's...if they were mine I would not be stuck in the middle of LB writing little fanfics...but oh well...PLEASE REVIEW...see above...**


End file.
